RTL Episode 49: Hope Amidst Miscarriages with Tina Sugandh

RTL Episode 49: Hope Amidst Miscarriages with Tina Sugandh

In this fertility episode, I am joined by Tina Sugandh. Tina is an international Bollywood star, reality TV personality, and founder of Mom on Top Shop (organic, all-natural, vegan and chemical-free skincare including bestsellers “Bake It” and “Shake It” for pregnancy and postpartum women). Sugandh and her husband, Tarz, starred on a series of reality shows including Bravo TV’s "Newylweds: The First Year". Highlights of her musical career include contracts with Sony and Hollywood Records, 3 Billboard charting singles, recording with Timbaland and Ringo Starr, and performing over 3,000 concerts since the age of 5, including at the Indian Grammy Awards. An advocate for miscarriage awareness, Sugandh has publicly shared her 8 pregnancies and 5 miscarriages. A mom of three, she encourages other women to carve their own parenting path and ignore the haters. 

Follow her on Instagram @TinaSugandh

Facebook @tinasugandh

Mom store is Etsy.com/shop/MomOnTopShop or MomOnTopShop.com

20% off code: Josephine20 everything at MomOnTopShop.com

Episode 49 Transcript

Josephine Atluri:

Welcome to responding to life podcast, where we talk about issues relating to health, fertility, and Parenthood. On today's episode, I am joined by Tina Sugandh. Tina is an international Hollywood star reality TV, personality and founder of mom on top shop an organic all natural vegan and chemical free skincare line, including bestsellers, bake it and shake it for pregnancy and postpartum women. tina and her husband cars started in a series of reality shows, including Bravo TV's newlyweds. The first year highlights of her musical career include contracts with Sony and Hollywood records. Three billboard charting singles recording with Timberland and Ringo Starr and performing over 3000 concerts since the age of five, including at the Indian Grammy awards and advocate for miscarriage awareness. Sugandh has publicly shared her eight pregnancies and five miscarriages, a mom of three. She encourages other women to carve their own parenting path and ignore the haters. Welcome to the show. Tina, I've been so excited to speak with you and hear all about your fertility journey. So thank you so much for joining me here today.

Tina Sugandh:

Thank you. And I'm thank you for what you're doing. Thank you for the awareness. Thanks for everything that you did for women. It's so important to just speak on all of this. So, thank you.

Josephine Atluri:

Yeah, absolutely. It's great to bring up awareness for these important topics. I think the best way for us to begin is to hear all about your struggles with pregnancy, that you've been so open about.

Tina Sugandh:

Is this like a four hour show because, Oh my gosh, my, my OB GYN put it best when she literally said she's a character, like, keep that in mind, but she just goes, you know, your body's really bad at making babies. I was like, yeah, you're right. Um, she's just, we're we're like besties. So it was, it was cool, but yeah, I honestly don't even know where to begin, but I want to just start off by, um, very clearly shouting this from the hilltops that w as, as many people know, but many people don't, um, one in four pregnancies end in miscarriage, and I think that is so important to get out there. Um, I had five miscarriages and initially I did not know this information and, um, excuse me, just like a lot of women. Uh, I thought there's something wrong with me. I was like, my body's not able to do this whole baby thing what's going on.

And, um, so once I learned that information, that one in four pregnancies end in miscarriage, it was not only something that made me feel more normal and less ashamed, but it was also, I made it like my life mission to just get the word out on that. Um, and I, I actually was able to go one of the times that I was on "Watch what happens live with Andy Cohen." I was able to say that it was, it was during like, I think it was the one where I did a really stupid pregnancy review. It's scary, still being like my belly was jeweled up and it was it actually, so was hubby's. Um, it was very, very interesting. Uh, it was a very interesting show, but yeah, so I was able to say that, um, and millions of women were listening and that was, that was honestly, I mean, I've done everything from, you know, play in jam and be on Ringo Starr's last album to, I've just done a lot of things I'm very grateful for, but that was probably my career highlight because of the amount of women that emailed me afterwards saying things that I'm getting goosebumps right now, talking about it.

Um, that just made me tear, um, things that, you know, their husband blames them for their miscarriages and their family is ashamed of them for missing it. Just all these things that are just horrible. So, so, um, I would say out of all my struggles and I'm happy to go into all, all the rest, but that was probably the biggest one. Um, I mean, honestly I could go on, on my, my, the other thing is, um, I had, uh, I had a three pounder, um, at a four pounder and I'm just, I just preterm labor is a big thing with me thing around here. Um, so the, the highlight of having, um, my, my bedrest and one of the one that was three pounds, snow is my little baby. It was my little preemie. Um, it's actually the reason I started my company mom on top shop.

Um, and mom and top shop is, um, I'll go into that in a second, but, uh, but basically I was in the hospital. Um, my doctor was like, I'm sorry to say this, but you're going to miss like Thanksgiving and Christmas and everything, and you're going to be stuck in the hospital for months and months. So instead of, you know, I watched that little TV with the clicker that doesn't work with the three channels that you don't want to want. You know, the Jerry Springer, it, the thing is on like 24 seven. And that's it. I did that for a couple of days. And then I'm like, I don't want to waste this opportunity that, you know, you have time when you're stuck in a hospital. So, so I did create my business, um, because of preterm labor. Wow. So if you, you know, trying to find the silver lining, right,

Josephine Atluri:

Thank you, you know, for, for being so open about it and for sharing it with the world, such that it made other women feel comfortable sharing it with you and, and talking about their experience because it's such a, it can be such a lonely process, but it can also be, um, it can create a lot of shame and issues with self-worth that you don't want to bring it up. And it's just been amazing to see how over the last few years it's really bubbled up into something that where people can feel comfortable, at least acknowledging what's happening and, and having a community to talk to about it, because it's hard to talk to people who haven't gone through it. Um, so many of us who experienced pregnancy loss are always in search of answers, but we don't know often how to advocate for ourselves. And you know, what questions to ask what tests to ask for.

So I'm curious to hear how you advocated for yourself over the course of the years with each passing miscarriage that occurred advocated in what way, in terms of like, trying to figure out, you know, for myself after I lost my twins in the second trimester, I just wanted to know what happened. Like what, you know, women are always saying, what did I do wrong? What, you know, what happened here? Um, but then not knowing like the next steps to do. So I'm curious to see if, you know, you did different approaches. Did you change doctors? Like, well, how did you, or if you didn't, um, sort of what that process looked like for you in terms of next steps.

Tina Sugandh:

Yeah. And I'm so sorry about your twins. I mean, did you, um, did you re, did you realize that it was just no, no one's fault and there's no reason for it? Or, or did you even know ?

Josephine Atluri:

It took a lot of time and there was something that, yeah, I grieved the loss of my twins, but, um, that trauma of just the whole experience of trying to conceive, I had didn't really resolve until much later it manifested into an eating disorder and all this stuff. And that, through that therapy, it came out that like all these unresolved things that I had sort of been buried inside then came, came up to surface and I was able to deal with them, but it wasn't something that I recognized at the beginning, which is why I am like asking, you know, women who have gone through miscarriages. Like, what did that process look like for you? Did you advocate for yourself? Didn't you, you know, what happened there?

Tina Sugandh:

Yeah. Yeah. Um, you know, I think in general, um, I was really lucky to be raised by a really positive mommy and, um, you know, she left us early, unfortunately, but I think with everything in life, like even losing my mom, you can sit there and be bitter and angry. And I definitely have my moments, um, especially her never getting to meet my three little kiddos who I'm biased, but I personally think they're pretty amazing. So, you know, you can either, um, you can either sit there and be bitter and angry, or you can say, man, I am so grateful for every second that I got to spend with her, which is the God's honest truth. So, so point being, I had a mom that made me this positive. And so with, with every miscarriage, um, what really, again, what really, really changed my mindset was, again, that one in four pregnancies are miscarried and that it's normal and it's okay.

And the fact, I didn't know that in the beginning, and that was hard. That was hard thinking that, um, there's something wrong with me and that maybe my body couldn't do this. Um, and I'm all, like I said, I'm a positive person. Um, my Instagram is really like about strength, trying to instill positivity to other women because I think that is everything. Attitude is everything. So yeah, that first one was definitely hard not knowing that information, but once I learned that it was so super common. Um, and again, this is why I love what you are doing. And I thank you because the problem is that not enough women talk about it, women are ashamed of it. And, and you know, if you're a private person, do, do you do your thing? If it's not something you want to talk about because you're private, that's fine.

But if it's something you don't want to talk about, because you're ashamed, I'd love to change that with women. Um, so, so what really helped me was no longer being ashamed of it. I'm realizing that I'm absolutely not alone. Um, I mean, I've talked to so many women about it and I was so shocked as to how many women that were willing to be open with me were just like, yeah, I had two miscarriages. Yeah. Oh yeah. I had a miscarriage and I not knowing how common it was. I was shocked about all the women that were, you know, just, just, just went through what I went through. And so I really, I'm really grateful to all the women that do speak out. Um, and I, that's definitely what helped me along my journey. Um, I didn't do anything like, um, changing doctors or anything like that because I knew that again, I'm positive.

I had hope. And I was like, I knew I was like, it's just going to happen. It's common. It happens. Um, and it did so, so yeah, to all the mamas out there, hang in there. Um, I've and I've heard having my business, having my business, which is, which is, it's like a skincare for all, but it's, um, it's geared toward, it started out with, for pregnancy. I've learned so many mamas pregnant stories and, um, it's just amazing how many miracle stories I've heard. So just, just, I guess I think hearing all that positivity, being surrounded with all that positivity women are freaking awesome. Um, sharing stories with women, hearing stories back that really helped me a ton. Um, and a funny story about our miscarriages. I shouldn't say funny, but, um, we actually had so many that when we were planning for a third child, um, we knew we had five miscarriages previously. So we were planning to have a third child and we started way earlier than we kind of wanted to thinking, of course, we're going to have a couple of miscarriages. Like we were planning it. Right. Just planning for them. Cause that's what my body does apparently. And she stuck and we had none. So we were like, we're like, we're not ready for a third child. What is happening? I mean,

It sounds awful, but I'm like, where are the miscarriages? What is it? So, you know, I mean, I think we just, we just put a positive spin on it and, um, that's all you can do in life. Isn't it? I mean, with everything, that's all you can do, whatever cards you're handed, all you can do is throw positivity your way, you know, bombard your brain with positivity and, um, you know, just hope, hope that everything turns out. Okay. So, so, so yeah, it's, it's definitely been a journey. I'm just very grateful for how everything ended up, especially, um, given that we had kids a little later in life, way later than I thought I would. But, um, but yeah, it it's, it's, everybody's healthy. So what more can I ask for?

Josephine Atluri:

Yeah, no, that's, I love it. You know, I mean, as a mindfulness and meditation coach, I obviously totally dig your vibe and love that you're able to look at things from a positive, um, perspective, because it's so important that it completely changes the way you, you live your life. It's such a game changer. And so I'm glad that you were able to look back at your experiences and able to put a positive spin on it. Um, I love looking at, you know, your Instagram with you and your little ones they're adorable and just it's, it just brings a smile to my face when I know that someone's gone through so much, um, so many challenges and adversity and are able to live life joyfully and also to help other people in the process we're currently in the throws of it, you know? Uh, so, Oh, go ahead.

Tina Sugandh:

No, I was just saying just, just to, just to be perfectly, I love, um, I also really love being real on my Instagram because that helped me too. And I just have to, um, interject and say that I definitely have my days, like I try to be positive, but, um, you know, I will go and scream into a pillow and I have my breakdowns too. So as, as hard as we all try to be positive, you know, mama's your normal, if you lose your, your, um, your shes, put that out there. Yeah,

Josephine Atluri:

No, that is important because it's, it can be hard to look at social media and try to aspire to something. And that can also trigger people, um, that, you know, that kind of the next question that I had for you was because you and your husband are in the spotlight. Um, how did you deal with, uh, with triggers because, you know, as you're trying to conceive and as you're going through the process and you're having miscarriages, I'm sure there were many things that, you know, you've had to endure and, but you were in the limelight, you were in the, you had a public face on, so how did you take time to sort of nurture yourself and protect yourself and create boundaries so that you could heal while still pursuing your career?

Tina Sugandh:

That's yeah, that's a great question. It's, something, I feel like a lot of people struggle with there's the haters, right? And, um, whether you're in a limelight or not, um, there's, people can unhappy, people are judgy, and if you, it can hurt, especially when, when you are going through something that wrecks your confidence to begin with, um, then the haters can get right in there, you know, um, you're just wide open for that. So, so I, I, another thing I try to share on my Instagram a lot, because it's helped me so much. Um, and it took me five years, I would say to get to this place. And a lot of it is thanks to hubby because his motto is like, who cares? Who cares? Who cares? So I'm about five years to go from, you know, like five years ago, if somebody was like, you're ugly, you're a bad mom, which you get a lot of, especially being in the limelight.

I would have been hurt by that possibly on a bad day, even cried. Um, now, I mean, I get comments, you know, I mean, I get comments, everything from, you know, just be, you're a horrible mom and your kids are gonna grow up, messed up and this and that, and your house is a trashy. And just all the things that, cause again, I'm very real on my Instagram. If I'm going to take a picture and I don't hide all the toys and you know, I'm a mom of three little kids. So, so I get, I do get a lot of hate, but I, um, I tell myself, this is how within a five-year span, I've grown to, um, be what I refer to as 94%, zero F I say 94% is because yes, I still have my days where you can tear me down very easily.

So, but, um, I had to displace by, by, by telling myself, and this is, this is true with everything with miscarriage and everything. Um, you know, the biggest thing that I like to focus on is that, um, mean judgy people are just unhappy in their own lives. So, you know, focus on positive people and positive things. And you know what I do with my haters, I just, I literally wish them happiness because I mean, happy people don't tend to tear other people down and I just that's it. And I'm like, okay, thanks for your opinion. You know, I all the happiness in the world to you because I do wish them happiness. I wish they were happy because everybody would be so nice if they weren't.

Yeah. Focus on the fact that it's not me. Um, people are going to tear you down if they're unhappy. So don't, don't let it affect you. Move on, move on to your family, to people that know you love you, accept you. Um, and then also I use the, will it matter in, I try to use the, will it matter in a day, will it matter in a week? Will it matter in a month, will matter in a year and almost like 90 something percent of the time, the answer is no, you know, thing, things that happen that we think are so, um, horrible and destructive and, you know, make us just set us off. Usually we just won't even matter in the next, like how it's just so true. I mean, I mean stop and think the next time you get upset about something, just stop and go.

Is this going to matter in months? Or like she called me this isn't going to matter in a month and I'm telling you most of the time, the answer is no. So what's the point of just move on, move on, move on to positive energy. Um, so that's, that's something that I, I really try to focus on. Um, that's helped me through everything through the miscarriages, through the preterm labor. Oh my God. Through through the worst, I have to mention it. If we're talking about, um, actually this is actually the reason my company mama Topshop was started was because I had the worst case. Do you know what pregnancy pups is? No. Oh my God. I'm so glad you don't. Um, I had one of the worst cases that dermatologists said they had like ever seen it's this, um, it's a skin condition. It's called pups, P U P P S.

And it's a skin condition. And I know some of your listeners right now are cringing and like making the worst faces because it is absolute sheer. It's just a nightmare. You're you? It's just the itchy thing. It's all, it's usually just on your abdomen and it's just like bubbles it, and it usually happens right after you deliver, except I had a three pound premium that was early. So it happened like, um, Oh wait, I'm sorry. It usually happens during the end of your pregnancy. But since I had mine two months early, it was after I delivered. Uh, but it's, it's, you really just want to scratch. You want to peel all your skin off. It is painful and itchy. And I had it like head to toe. Um, yeah. And, and, um, that's why I created my company because it was the only thing that literally I had like deep purple scars from my face to my toes and I felt like a monster.

And it was the only thing that like faded those deep purple scars and, and all that. But, but yeah, so, so everything that I've been through, it's, it's the mindset of, um, remembering that people that try to take you down are unhappy in their own lives. And it's not me. And also remembering that none of this really matters. Somebody saying you're a bad mom is not gonna matter tomorrow. Today. It's not, it's not gonna matter in a week in a month. So I, those, those two rules I live by and they help me on a daily basis because we all have, I think we all deal with that. Whether it's like your in-laws or your, you know, your cousin or your best friend or people like us who are a little bit more on the spotlight,

Josephine Atluri:

But yeah, I love, I love your, your, um, strategy of asking that question to yourself because it, you know, I'm all about telling people to take a pause in life and to do a pattern, interrupt, to be able to shift yourself from negativity to positivity. And by asking yourself questions and talking to yourself, um, you're able to do that. You're able to interrupt that cycle of negativity that you otherwise would have gotten into. And by asking that fabulous question of like, will this really matter in such and such matter of days or whatever weeks, that's a great way to stop that whole cycle and, and prevent yourself from spinning into that. You know, that rabbit hole of negativity. I love that.

Tina Sugandh:

Thank you. Yeah. And, and it's so important, but, and it is hard and it does take time. And like I said, it was probably a good five years that I went from being affected by these senseless, meaningless comments to now where I just kind of laugh most, most days, you know, again, I have my bad days, but most days I just laugh at them. Like the you're you're a horrible mom and all, I mean, just laugh at him. Yeah. You know, it's, it's just so silly. Um, and some of them are funny. Like the people that say, I look like a man, I'm like, okay, like, Oh my God, like, whatever, it's just so silly. So yeah. Hopefully we can just flick them off and laugh and move on. I think just moving on is very important.

Josephine Atluri:

Yeah, absolutely. You have a great, uh, sort of mindset, but it does. And like a thick skin. I am feel that, but it takes practice. It will be hard at the beginning, but the more and more you do it, the more and more you like then reaping the benefits and you see it in action and the more you are able to do it and just live it, you know, it becomes not just something that you force yourself to do. It just becomes sort of natural. It's like a process that you suddenly go through. I'm curious to hear, uh, Tina, about your relationship with your husband, because a lot of the clients that I have with fertility mindfulness and, you know, I lead these fertility, Facebook groups and stuff. A lot of them discuss like issues with their partner and how, how they have to work through it because fertility, you know, and going through miscarriages and all of that can create strains on your relationship. And if you don't already have like a really strong relationship, it doesn't even matter if you do already doubt, like having all of those hardships put on you as a stressor. And so I'd love to hear, you know, what that looked like for the two of you, if it was different, you know, if your brief process was different from your husband's and how you just sort of navigated that as a, as a couple.

Tina Sugandh:

Um, you know, I, he definitely has faults, he's human, but I will say, um, as far as all the baby stuff in the, I mean, he he's been, he's incredible. He, he, he, I'm the crazy one and he's just more common and wonderful. And he's, I've been crazy since day one and it hasn't stopped and he's just always loved it for some crazy reason. Um, I don't think anyone else in the world would have married me. I mean, he's just, we've just, he loves to laugh. He would just make jokes of it in light of it. And, um, yeah, it's, it's been, he's just been wonderful. I mean, I will say, I will say this, if you're not already married, just definitely marry your best friend. Uh, because, um, another thing I like to be really, really real about, and I know this is a little bit off topic from what you asked.

Um, but you know, we, and I don't even know, I don't know, you can edit this out if we don't, we're not supposed to go here, but you know, things change in a marriage. Um, you go through all of this, you have kids and we don't have like a sex life right now. And it's perfectly okay. Like he's the type of guy that just, um, whatever life throws at you. I think he's just, he's just very positive. Like me, like we, we are okay. We had a, we had five miscarriages it's okay. You know, we move on, we're at a place right now where we're so focused on our businesses and our kiddos that, like I said, we don't have that kind of time for each other. And it's okay. And I think, um, I really think again, marry your best friend, marry somebody who is real, um, and just understanding and like a real partner, it's, it, it, it does change things, life, all of these things, all these crazy curve balls that life throws at you, um, the ups and downs, and I know it's cliche, but you know, you know, there are ups and downs in marriage and, and you just communication is everything.

Um, I think the way that we got through all of this and the way we get through everything is communication. Um, you know, with the miscarriages, nobody, we never held back about anything. We felt it wasn't, um, even if it was something horrible, like I blame you, which didn't happen, but anything even horrible thoughts we talk about, we don't, we don't hold anything, hold anything back. And I would say, I mean, my advice, if you are going through all of this is, is just talk, just be open. You mean be gentle, but just be open. And, and another cliche communication is everything in a marriage. And I, I can't stand behind that more. Um, it's, it's so important in everything, especially when you're going through my gosh, Oh my gosh. I mean, child loss and all of these horrible things that people endure, um, and pregnancy can be hard. I mean, everything from the hormones and the emotions I'm already like insane as it is. And so pregnancy made me even crazier. My husband was just here for it.

Like, I married the crazy I'll take the crazy. And, um, so, so yeah, I mean, I would just say, just communicate, just talk, just talk about, um, gently talk about what you're feeling and what you're not feeling. And I think that's how you get through things in life. And, um, I just think it's so important to be open and honest. I feel like if you don't discuss, like, you know, when you had a miscarriage, a, B and C, then five years later, that will come out, you'll Harbor that negativity and it'll come out in a different way. So I think that's how we got through everything. It's just very, very open communication, gentle, open communication.

Josephine Atluri:

That's beautiful. I love that you were able to, to work together as a team on all of this, and it's so important because it's, it's tough to do by yourself. Definitely. And it's great that you have a support network and that you're able to lean into someone and your partner and trust that they will catch you when you need them. You know, that's fantastic. Um,

Tina Sugandh:

Here's an example. He's, he's the type of guy when we were trying to make babies. Um, of course I, we were pretty sure this is a myth, but you know how they say, if you put your legs up after that, that like, you know, the thermal travel, he would sit there with his legs up with me and we would just giggle like squirrel. I mean, that's how supportive he is. We just, we love to laugh and make light of things. And he's just like, he's my BFF. And so, yeah.

Josephine Atluri:

Wow. That's beautiful. I love that. So, yeah, that's fantastic. I'd love to pivot over, um, real quick to just motherhood. So you have three kids and as I was catching up on your Instagram, I saw that your son has kidney disease. I'd love to hear, I hope you know how he's doing, but also just how you're able to, as this really positive person who's had all of these challenges and have learned from them. How, as a mother, you're able to impart and support your own child, who's going through their own challenges, um, using the wisdom that you've gained throughout your experiences.

Tina Sugandh:

Yeah. Thanks. That's a great question. Um, I, I have to say, um, here's how I was raised. My mother who passed away, um, she had breast cancer and, you know, she, I will never forget this moment because I think it was one of those life changing moments where my head went my head. I was like, okay, I guess this is how we need to be in life. Um, she was going to get chemo and, you know, you have, you have to, you have two choices there, right? You can say I'm about to get chemo. Um, you know what chemo is, it's, it's horrible. It's horrible. It's horrible. And instead what she said, um, we'll never forget this. Um, she said to me, she's like, Oh, teeny Lou. She calls me tinny. And she's like, she's like, teeny, let's go. We're going to go to chemo.

And she's like, I'm so lucky I get to meet all these wonderful people. And that's what she said about, she's like, I get to go out and meet a whole bunch of wonderful people. And I, that really, I'm just, I'm almost in tears. I mean, that, that really changed a lot of, of where my head space was, especially, it was really young and, um, you know, you tend to be, you know, especially when you're younger, you tend to think everything. Isn't a boy doesn't like you, and it's like the end of the world. Right. So that was a great lesson. So that's who I was raised by, um, just a positive, positive, radiant beam of sunshine. And so I do try to pass that down to my kids. Um, when we learned that my son had kidney disease, I, um, well, first of all, very real about it, very open about it, because again, it has helped.

I came to find it has helped so many moms because they DM me, they ask me questions and I'm able to communicate and let them know our experience and they can let them let me know their experience. And so I love helping, um, and being helped and inspired back is incredible. But also it's the same exact frame of mind as my mom taught me. Just, you gotta focus on what you have. Um, he's good right now, he's on a lot of steroids. Um, but, but you gotta focus on what you have. You, you have to, it's just, you just have a choice. You can either focus on the fact that you have kidney disease and it sucks, and the steroids are making you crazy. Or you can focus on the fact that you have legs, you know, that move. And it's like, it's things that are that simple.

Um, I mean, I'm the type of, and I'm not perfect. I hate to sound like I'm like this positive beam of light. Like I said, I there's times I want to jab a pen in my eye. Like, I'm just done. So I'm normal, I'm human. But, um, I try as hard as I can. Like, like, even, even when I like go to the grocery store, sometimes I'll just run. And this sounds so silly, but I'll just run from my car to the door because I'm like, I have legs and I can run. And that's cool. Like, that's amazing. So I think we often forget to just look at our fingers and go, my fingers are moving. That's freaking something to be super, super grateful about. And, um, I mean, obviously that's an analogy for so many things, but that's what we're doing with this kidney disease. We're taking it. We're, we're throwing as much positivity as we can on all the things he has and he's, he's doing great right now. So, um, so yeah, that's again, I keep saying it, but that's, you just, all you can do is, is, is make a choice. Whether you're going to look at the bright side or the stuff that sucks. Cause there's probably, there's a whole bunch of each. Right.

Josephine Atluri:

Right. Yeah. Well, I'm so glad to hear that your son is doing well and that he's getting through it and, and you were right about the choice. And it goes back to what I was saying before and how I like to talk about the power of the pause, because if you just pause in a certain moment and it gives you that moment to decide, okay, I can make this choice. Like you said, you can make the choice to think positively about this and about the things that you have and be appreciative of that and focus on that. Or you can make the choice to go down the other road of negativity, but it takes that quick second of, of remembering to pause. It's sort of, it goes back to being mindful and being aware of, of yourself, um, which is why I always like to infuse mindfulness into everything and try and get people to do it. But I love that you're able to share that with your children and so that they can learn from you in that. And you know, when every time you talk about your mom, it just makes my heart sort of, um, skip a beat because I lost my mom very recently, like two months ago. And everything that you're saying is just like, Oh my God, how did she know to say these things? So that resonates so much. Thank you for sharing all of that.

Tina Sugandh:

And that's so, Oh, I'm so sorry.

Josephine Atluri:

No, but yeah, no. Yeah, it was, it was so sudden, but it's beautiful. The things that you were saying, because it just, it's the stuff that I needed to hear and I'm sure a lot of people need to hear about just, you know, about looking at things in a different way.

Tina Sugandh:

I can't say that I was, I was focusing on the fact that I had her in all the beautiful seconds that I had or two months after. So gosh, I hope you're just taking your time to just grieve away. That's horrible. I'm so sorry.

Josephine Atluri:

Yeah, no, but conversations like this are so beneficial. And so, um, taking those nuggets from people and that's the whole point of the podcast is hearing how people respond to life. No,

Tina Sugandh:

I guess I was just going to say, you know, you keep talking about pausing and that is something I will take away and really use. Um, I, I'm pretty insane As you know, I'm really Hyper and I, I'm just, I'm like in love with life and I'm happy, but I do forget to pause and I love that you said that, um, I mean so much. So when I auditioned for Bravo, they initially said no to me, because they said you can't really be like this all the time. And my husband was like, no, she's really, that's crazy, But I forget to pause And I love that. I love it. I love it. I love it. So thank you.

Josephine Atluri:

Uh, that's amazing. So, you know, I was going to ask you, um, I always end with asking my guests, if there's a lesson learned or takeaway that they can share with our listeners to help them respond to life in a more mindful way. Uh, but I feel like you shared so many with us already. Uh, you've just been super helpful in so many wonderful pieces of advice. So I will switch over then to the other question that I ask, which is sharing a gratitude that you have for today.

Tina Sugandh:

Oh, wow. Um, specific little today or in general or anything, anything goes, anything goes, wow. Um, I mean, a gratitude I have for today is just something as simple as the fact that I can walk it. It's I think focusing on the little things like that are super important because we do take, or at least I take all these things for granted. The fact that I'm healthy, alive can move, can walk and see can breathe, can smell, can taste. Um, so my gratitude today is just the fact that I am here and Able to move because we take for granted the little things. So there you go.

Josephine Atluri:

Yeah. And I love to have people bring up their gratitude and it's something I do with my kids at the end of the day. But it's another, it's another sort of tactic for switching your mind from negativity to positivity is remember to just think about something you're grateful for and it can boost your mood. And I'm so grateful that I was able to connect with you and speak with you and share all of your wisdom and your experiences with the audience. And, um, my husband is grateful that I made that connection. So hopefully I can one day meet you and learn some Bollywood dance moves because my husband's South Indian. And when he heard I was interviewing you he was like, Oh my God, can she teach you how to dance/ But I just, I can't quite dance.

Tina Sugandh:

Oh my goodness, Coming over, I'll come over whatever. And we'll hook up and we'll, we'll do it.

Josephine Atluri:

Well, it'll be fun. All of that. Yeah. Um, so in the spirit of giving and receiving, I'd love for you to talk a little bit about the shop that you have, about how the listeners can connect with you and learn more about you. Yeah. It's um, so the last

Tina Sugandh:

This thing never thought I would be doing is, you know, a shop with, with skincare for all. I mean, I'm, I'm an entertainer I've been performing since I was five years old, but like I said, I had the worst case of these dark purple pregnancy pups marks that you've ever seen. Dermatologists were like, they will never fade your stomach's going to be all purple-y and dark and nothing was working. And I hooked up with a world renowned skin healing physician, and we created like this or in my kitchen, this organic vegan, completely natural, no water, no chemicals, nothing. Um, with just the right amount of like everything. Um, and within about three or four months of using like the scrubbing cream, everything faded, I mean, I'm completely, everything is stretchmark free and pups free and scar free. And I couldn't believe it to the point where I was like, why don't I jar it up and share it with people just like as a side thing.

Um, and then their reviews for like tighter skin and stretch marks and things like that were so good that I was like, this is not at all what I ever thought I'd been doing with my life. But women would come to me like crying and being like, I've tried, you know, everything, all the miracle creams quote unquote on the spend hundreds on this and laser and that. And, um, this is the only thing that works. So between that, I just felt like we had to go for it. So we're, we're kind of starting to take the, the company really seriously. Um, it's called mom on top shop. It's about, you know, being a mom on top, but it also sounds a little risky.

Really about the other thing I really wanted to feel when I was pregnant was just not like old and tired. I want it to feel vibrant and sexy. And so I just wanted to make a brand that looked a little more like I, like I wanted when I was pregnant, like just to feel a little sexy and glamorous and excited and, you know, vibrant rather than tired and old, which a lot of pregnant women feel like I did as well. So, so we created a brand that looks different. It's the stuff is amazing. And then we ventured out to just make it for everybody because it helps with everything from just daily skincare. Like it's, it's completely, like I said, organic vegan, natural, no chemicals. Um, I put all of the stuff on my kids that, you know, it's all just so good for you.

It's wholesome. And like, I will never go back to ingredients that I can't pronounce again. Um, because the difference is incredible. So, so it's just, now we have, we have stuff for men and babies and just everybody. Um, like I said, it's really good, wholesome daily skincare. And it also just, it also helps with, um, the reviews are incredible. I mean, you need to go read them, but it also helps with scars and stretch marks and tightening tightening skin and Oh, eczema. We have a lot of eczema and like irritated skin, um, customers and just, I mean, teenagers with stretch marks that whose moms have said, this has helped so much with their confidence and we did, the reviews are so I'm so grateful. I'm so grateful for people who like leave those reviews and let me know. And I mean, I like we're, it's just, I can't thank everybody enough, but yeah. So that's, that's, that's, that's what I'm doing now, which is so, so fun and so crazy.

Josephine Atluri:

I love it. I love it. Well, I'll definitely check that out for my kiddos. They have eczema, so I'm always looking for things to help them out. But thank you. I will send you that we have a product called tiny and shiny.

Tina Sugandh:

I will send you some, my kids love it so much. They, they like, they will use it after bath and like it's just calming and it's, it's very, very light and like, it's just beautiful. And so they, and, and I love that it's good for them and it's wholesome and they can use it. And I don't have to feel like, you know, the guilt of the chemicals or anything like that. I mean, it's crazy what they put in baby stuff in the stores. It really, I had no idea until I ventured out into this business, but yeah, I would love to send you some tiny ones.

Josephine Atluri:

Awesome. All right. Well, everyone check it out, momontopshop.com and I'll also include that in the summary. Well, thank you so much, Tina, for coming here and sharing and conversation and being so candid about your experiences and give me so many actionable tips. I love it.

Tina Sugandh:

Thank you. Thank you so much. And I am so excited to go share with my husband. The there's two main things that I can't wait to share with them. The two things that I've learned from you today, but there's, there's so much I've learned back and I I'm so grateful for again, what you did for me, what you do for women. Um, God, the world needs more of you

Josephine Atluri:

And same for you, so good to connect. Absolutely. Thank you. Thank you for listening to today's episode of the responding to life podcast. For more info on today's guest, check out the episode summary. I'd love to connect with you more. So be sure to check out my website, responding to life podcast.com for links to previous episodes, articles I've written and interviews I've done on mindfulness, meditation and fertility and parenting. You'll also find free video meditations on my site and on my YouTube channel Josephine that worry meditation. If you'd like to book a one-on-one session with me, you can do so on the website. You can also follow me on Instagram at Josephine RN, Marie for daily inspiration and mindfulness tips. Finally, I'd love for you to join my Facebook groups, to connect with a supportive community and receive greater insight on how to incorporate mindfulness into your life. Check out the mindful parenting group with Josephine that Larry or the empowering your fertility group. Thanks again for tuning in today. I look forward to sharing more conversations with you on how to respond to life in a more mindful way.